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How to talk to kids about tricky subjects: pornography and sex in the media

A MARTÍNEZ, HOST:

All right, parents. This next story is about one of those talks you might want to have with your tweens and teens. Not an easy one. It'll probably be awkward. But the American Psychological Association is recommending you have it nonetheless. Here's NPR's Katia Riddle. And a warning - this story might not be appropriate for younger kids.

KATIA RIDDLE, BYLINE: If you've avoided having conversations with your teenager around pornography, you are not alone.

SUPREET MANN: We found that more than half of the teens in our sample had talked to a trusted adult about things like relationships, sex, birth control. But much fewer have talked to adults about pornography.

RIDDLE: Supreet Mann is the director of research for Common Sense Media. Mann has studied how much pornography teens watch and how to talk to them about it. One thing that's clear? We've come a long way since the days of the Playboy magazine under the bed.

MANN: 15% of the teens in our study said that they first saw pornography at age 10 or younger, and the average age reported for first viewing of pornography was 12.

RIDDLE: Mann says as difficult as it is to broach the subject with kids, it's more necessary than ever. Many teens report seeing violent and degrading sexual imagery that includes things like choking or assault. That said, most of them can grasp the difference between fact and fiction.

MANN: They understand how content can be manipulated to push a particular type of view. But that doesn't mean that they understand the construction of the relationships, as well.

RIDDLE: This is where she says kids really need to hear from their parents. Concepts like misogyny or power dynamics in pornography, for example, can be important to talk about. She suggests keeping these conversations brief, having scripted talking points and choosing a discrete time period to talk to your child - a short car trip, for example. Mitch Prinstein with the American Psychological Association says it's important to engage with kids on the topic of sexuality in media, starting early.

MITCH PRINSTEIN: I'm not talking about watching porn with your children, of course. I'm talking about, you know, very appropriate, tween kind of geared programming that starts to get kids, you know, asking questions.

RIDDLE: Prinstein's organization issued the recent report on teenagers' viewing habits. That same report also warned of the dangers of social media influencers, who can peddle misinformation about sexuality or degrading ideas about body image. Prinstein says some concerning content even comes from the past.

PRINSTEIN: In our society, the way that sexuality and sexual behavior has been depicted has changed dramatically over the years. Kids might watch something from even the '70s and the '80s and not recognize how different that might be if that same scene were shown today.

RIDDLE: None of this is easy to talk about. But another thing the research has shown? Kids benefit from and appreciate these conversations with their parents, even when they don't say as much.

Katia Riddle, NPR News. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.

Katia Riddle
[Copyright 2024 NPR]